Life and Adoption news

So S and I finally had a true blue couple moment this weekend when my feelings were hurt over something and his feelings got hurt because he felt bad about hurting my feelings.  We don't really see it as "that we had an argument", but we were able to finally test our communication skills and we worked through it and lived to tell about it!  Ha!  We still maintain that we haven't had a true blue argument yet, however, most of our time together after Tigger is in bed is spent in conversation and discussion over books that we are reading....which are books on relationships.  (Yes we really are THAT corny)  Currently we are discussing "Love Languages the Singles Edition" and have taken our love language profile so we have an idea of the hierarchy each other feels is most important to them.  There is a book about that for married people too and I think it's great.  S and I have been able to learn more information about how we grew up, what our pet peeves are, how we feel loved, about each other than just in random conversation.  So yeah obviously I think it's a great book to talk about and share with your spouse or significant other.

S, Tigger, and I enjoying ourselves after resolving our 'moment'

In Adoption News:

I don't think I ever advertised on the blog that I was homestudy ready for adding a second child into my home, but I have been since the summer and since before meeting S.  He knew about it and has been a steadfast supporter.  I'm sure it helps that he is a medical social worker and runs groups for domestic violence and substance abuse for the office of probation in the county that he lives in.  Anyways in 8 months I had not received a call.  Today I did, however, unfortunately, both my social worker and I ended up thinking the match was not a good fit for my home so I ended up having to pass on the match.  That always puts me in a bad mood only because children are not vehicles or appliances.  Even if I did the best thing for the child by passing so she could then be placed with an appropriate family, the thought process for me is that I rejected a child.  That always leaves a bad taste in my mouth.  Children should not ever be in a position where they need to get rejected or passed by.  There are many things about the foster/adoption process that are hard, however, I think that when one says "no" to a match....even if it's the right and best decision due to circumstances....that is the most painful part of the process.  My prayers go out to all the children that need homes and that they end up in the right ones.

And in final news, Tigger will begin ballet/tap lessons tomorrow!

could you just die!  I love tiny dance shoes

Hospital part II

So my last post left you all knowing that my precious Tigger was in the hospital.  Last week she stayed home all week long and I stayed home 3 days out of 5 since I could only get help for 2 days.  Tigger was still recovering so it was quite an exhausting week hence no blogging for tired mommy!

Anyways, I told you all that we had some classic "adoption" moments at the hospital.  The first one is the obvious question when we arrived via ambulance.
Nurse: "is there a family history of asthma"?
Me:  ummmm *crickets chirping*  I don't think so? but I'm not positively sure.....
Nurse:  "can you explain?"
Me:  I adopted Tigger and have some medical information but not very extensive so I don't think so but I'm not entirely sure
Nurse: "oh, ok"
Me:  I have a goofy smile on my face....thinking....Oh Lord, this is just the beginning.

the classic shift change bringing in a Nurse that is highly conversational and intrusive albeit a highly "special" one (even though she was nice, she was just special let me tell you)

Nurse:  Oh wow....mom mom where did baby get her curly hair?
S:  squeezes my hand hard.....translation:  you're not telling ms. busybody are you?
Me:  smiling sweetly "oh it runs in the family"
S:  laughs heartily
Room:  laughter.....(I had about 6-8 family visitors constantly)
Nurse:  oh runs in family...yeah I know....my granddaughters are twins....guess what?  they are blonde  BLONDE....(nurse is Asian)
Me:  laughs out of hospital stress and just wanting Ms. Busybody and my well meaning family to exit the room so I can breathe and focus on Tigger

Later S says to me:  "I'm all about honesty and stuff, but really....Ms. Busybody didn't need that information, good answer honey!"
Me:  Thanks babe!

Saturday night, S spent the night at the hospital with Tigger and I and in the morning....oh Ms. Busybody nurse came in and was talking to S in this manner:  "so daddy, have baby sit here with you"
Me:  "......."  I was a bit taken aback
S:  Come here Tigger and sit with me
Me:  mouths 'thanks honey'

Yes the weekend was full of reminders of how un-typical my family is.

What a weekend

What.A.Weekend!

I should begin with saying that both Tigger and I are home and that she is doing well.  Now I get to tell you that Tigger was hospitalized on Friday first for asthma and secondly they found out she had Pneumonia.  It was a rough weekend.  I was stressed out, Tigger looked bad Friday, and I'm switching Pediatricians.

First of all, I had been concerned about her health and had taken her in.....Pediatrician who has not done much for her when she's ill even though her other one had, sent us home telling me she would probably just get better....but to bring her back in if she still had a fever amidst my urging that the only reason she didn't have a fever was because I had given her some Ibuprofen.  Well, she just didn't look well and spiked another fever and that was it, I took her back and sure enough, by that time she was having asthma, and looking horrible enough that the Dr. immediately phoned the Hospital and within the hour we were transported by ambulance over to the hospital where we would stay for the next 2 1/2 days.

Tigger was a champ.....all the nurses fell in love with her, (of course who can resist) because she is an easy patient, she takes all her meds like a champ and doesn't thrash around.  First night in the hospital was just her and I.....luckily the chair in the room was a pull out bed chair although it is more of a cot really, smaller than a twin size bed and I didn't get much sleep....Tigger wasn't having a great night, Oxygen levels were down, and she needed breathing treatments quite regularly.  When we woke up and spoke with the Dr., they had found spotting in her lungs indicative of pneumonia and were going to keep her for one more day.  They also did that viral panel for RSV which then meant Tigger was in isolation and we got to wear awesome hospital gowns and masks so as not to pass out bugs if we went in and out of the room.  While we had family over visiting, Tigger had an asthma attack in front of all of us.....not very cool.  Luckily it calmed down once the nurse was called and she received more inhaler medicine.

The second night went so much better.  Tigger's fever broke and was steady at 97.8, she slept well without having coughing or asthmatic fits, S who had to work Saturday morning so couldn't stay the first night, spent the night at the hospital with us in that small cot....that was a feat!  He was a great help....and he was able to get Tigger to eat more food when I couldn't get her to eat so I was very thankful he was around.

Sunday afternoon we were finally released and now I'm just taking care of her and luckily I have some family that can help take care of her this week as she can't go to preschool for a week.  So I can still go to work some days this week as well.  And that was our summary of the weekend.  When I write next, I'll incorporate how adoption, lack of medical knowledge, and this visit went.  Some funny moments....but really, the first time lack of medical knowledge left a real uneasy feeling, even if the questions were minor.

Don't you love my family in their hospital garb?  Also look at that smile on Tigger, isn't it a wonder the nurses loved her?  She is a happy girl even in the midst of not feeling well

Moving forward

Well during this week, I had S over two times for dinner and TV.  He's getting to be quite regular around here!

I also practiced more hairstyles on my Tigger and feel like I can do her hair justice and can always improve.  It's been a good week.

Oh my....The Hair

Being a mom is challenging enough.....being a mom to a girl is a trip.......being a mom to a girl with completely different hair than you are used to...well let's just say that's an adventure.

I've made no secret that Tigger is biracial and that I am the whitest Hispanic person on the planet along with a history of not caring about my hair.  Well dear friends, those days are over.

Fortunately Tigger's hair has been easy to maintain, however, it is growing more and I notice that it tends to dry and frizz like no one's business very quickly.  So I've been learning about hair care these past 3 weeks, what curly hair needs are, what biracial/multiracial hair needs may be, etc.

Two things I've learned:

1)  I've learned about a a line of products (shampoo, conditioner, moisturizers, cream) that works for Tigger's hair.  I mean yeah she looks like she's played, but the hair....well it's not out of control when I pick her up from preschool anymore.  Yay!  I know it will make her happy in the long run because she loves looking pretty.

2)  I've learned that I'm not good at braiding, I need practice, and that YouTube is my friend.  I tried to braid Tigger's hair for the first time tonight....nothing fancy, but regular braids....I failed miserably, but it prompted me to go to a couple of blogs about hair that I've seen recently and to YouTube, so I feel more prepared to go at it again later this week.

Why am I blogging about this?  Well because I think it helps foster a child's self-esteem to know they are put together and look their best.  This is one of the many ways in which we are not alike and another reminder of the adoption connection.  Instead of not celebrating that difference, I think it's important to make sure she learns to take pride in herself....from hair to toes!

Please enjoy my horrid first attempt.  My promise to Tigger is that I will continue practicing and getting better!  Mami loves you Tigger!

Yes....we are different!

I don't think I've made it a secret that I grew up as a tomboy.  If you didn't know that, here's a rundown of my favorite toys/activities as a child:

1.  Legos
2.  Matchbox cars
3.  Lincoln Logs
4.  Tinker Toys
5.  Trains
6.  Sports/primarily softball

I also could have cared less about styling my hair and was happy to let my mom do my hair and not learn anything about it til I was in high school.  Yes you read that right....high school....then I cut my hair short.

Then I became a mom.  And this is what my daughter loves at the moment:

1.  Baby dolls
2.  pretending to wear make-up like mom (I now do...didn't before)
3.  kitchen
4.  pretend play with princess dresses
5.  clothes/shoes

And today as we were getting ready for a viewing/funeral (yes I'm Hispanic so we do take our little kids to these things as lessons such as life/death are taught early) she goes into my closet and takes out a scarf and told me I needed to wear it with my dress....what was funny was that the scarf actually matched/went with my outfit.  I was floored.  Apparently I already have a fashion designer/adviser.

Oh and I also was blessed with a daughter that has curly hair.  In other words, this tomboy mom is constantly scouring the internet, help from friends, and learning as she goes to make sure Tigger has great hair....

Ironic much?  I have to say, I am intrigued by this 'girl' world though!  Am glad to be part of it!

a recap of 2011

Happy New Year Blogger family!

I hope that 2012 has great things planned for you all.  2011 was a great year for us and I decided to do a recap!

First time at play group Jan. 2011

The first time, she pretended to play house and clean Feb. 2011

New Room set up

New Big Girl Bed

First time at the Wild Animal Park

First time at Vacation Bible School Summer 2011

Turns 2 at Chuck E. Cheese Summer of 2011

First time at the beach for the day

First completion of swimming lessons summer 2011

first time at Sea World

Last Day of her daycare Summer 2011

First day of Nursery Preschool Aug. 2011

First pony ride by herself September 2011

First big ride....the giant slide September 2011

First Christmas Performance Dec. 2011

Beginning of a more serious relationship with S Oct. 2011

New Year's Eve....Tigger in bed and mami hanging out with S 

To a great 2012.

Merry Christmas from our house to yours!

Christmas Eve is with family and Christmas day every family does their own thing.  This year has been beyond awesome!

After waking me up at 6am by the Christmas tree.....Tigger is now napping and mami needs to clean up downstairs....so bye bye blog family.  Merry Christmas

Mommy put herself in time-out

Today was a tough day.  Tigger wanted her underwear but did NOT want to go near the bathroom and then would become upset if there was an accident.  She also whined for many things during the day.  When nap time came I just put her in bed and put myself in time-out.

I'm usually the most patient person, however, the unending screaming and throwing of objects towards me was a bit much.  I don't think Tigger is feeling well so she went to bed early.  I have never hit my child or lost it with her, and I'd like to keep it that way.....at least until the teen years ha ha ha.  Today was just one of those days.  We can have a do-over tomorrow.

You want to know the funny part?  During moments of sane-ness, Tigger would ask for hugs and kisses and I was left thinking that this was the best thing ever and that I'm glad to have time off and to only spend it with her during the daytime.

I'm so glad S came over later and gave me a massage.  That totally helped.  Well, I'm ready for tomorrow.  Time for bed!  Not everyday is a rose garden, but you know what?  We wouldn't appreciate the good if we didn't go through the ugly!

The Potty Chronicles continue

Today I felt better about giving Tigger more liquids to drink between the timer going off.  I noticed she would listen to the timer go off and head straight to the bathroom.  I still am teaching her how to lower her undies and climb onto the big potty, but then she does her business and all is well.  She had one mood swing with the timer and basically she didn't need to go, so she was whining in an attempt to let me know.  The next time the timer went off, she went with no problems.

I count the days in halves.  She is now at nap time so half number one of the day is over.  After nap time is half two.  Our first half was great today and no accidents yet.  I'm sure there still will be, I'm going to start offering her more liquids and see how it goes.

Well it's finally here

As a single working parent, I finally have 2 weeks and 1 day of vacation for winter break.  (Yeah working for the schools)  So what am I doing on this fabulous time off?

Officially potty training Tigger.  Have thought about it since September....but it never took and we were always out on the weekends, so today was day one in Minnie Mouse Undies.  I'm tired, I'm glad she's in bed.  Let's see how tomorrow goes although I have to say 1 major accident and one minor one on the way to the potty isn't bad.  I don't think I'll be able to relax until I have 3 days under my belt and then I probably won't relax.  Yup, so much for relaxing vacations....I think all that finished a while back.  Woo hoo parenting the 2's.

Flying by

Is it just me or is this Christmas season just flying by at super power speed?  Tigger and I have done a lot of stuff this month already.  S and I have done a lot of stuff this month already.  The three of us have done lots of stuff this month.  I can't believe that Christmas is here in a week!

Well here is a glimpse of the life of December:

Christmas program at the church....Tigger dressed as an Angel

Christmas program at Tigger's Preschool in the church next door to it:  They sang five songs and recited a little children's poem with grandparents beaming proudly:

Christmas Tree excitement!  Yes Tigger loves Christmas trees and smiles big for the camera:

And Birthday Parties galore.  Who knew Tigger had so many friends with December birthdays:

Our family loves to go look at lights.  Luckily we live semi-close to a neighborhood that has an extravagant display of lights:

And of course December wouldn't be December without a family picture:

Here's hoping the Christmas season is bringing joy in your life as it has to mine!