Merry Christmas from our house to yours!

Christmas Eve is with family and Christmas day every family does their own thing.  This year has been beyond awesome!

After waking me up at 6am by the Christmas tree.....Tigger is now napping and mami needs to clean up downstairs....so bye bye blog family.  Merry Christmas

Christmas brings a full circle

Two stories of loss and new life for Christmas.

My darling daughter Tigger was placed with me 2 years ago during the month of December.  I'm very enamoured with her and love being her mom.  Of course her placement didn't come without a story of loss, all foster children little or big come to their new families with a past loss.  I wish nothing but success and happiness for her.  Right now, I"m just happy she is 2 years old and enjoying herself this Christmas and loving life.  Emotions are a funny thing.

This year, I am in love with a wonderful guy.  I just received a delivery of a dozen red roses about 2 hours ago with a note saying simply "I love you, S".  That story also begins with a loss.  7 years ago his wife passed away suddenly and tragically.  He can miss his late wife and we can still be in love together this Christmas.  Emotions are a funny thing.

Here's my Christmas wish.....that we can grow and know that our losses make us who we are, but that our new lives also make us who are too.  May they intertwine and not compete with each other.  Life is a journey.  To the two people I love this Christmas....I love every part of who you both are....the past and the present.

Mommy put herself in time-out

Today was a tough day.  Tigger wanted her underwear but did NOT want to go near the bathroom and then would become upset if there was an accident.  She also whined for many things during the day.  When nap time came I just put her in bed and put myself in time-out.

I'm usually the most patient person, however, the unending screaming and throwing of objects towards me was a bit much.  I don't think Tigger is feeling well so she went to bed early.  I have never hit my child or lost it with her, and I'd like to keep it that way.....at least until the teen years ha ha ha.  Today was just one of those days.  We can have a do-over tomorrow.

You want to know the funny part?  During moments of sane-ness, Tigger would ask for hugs and kisses and I was left thinking that this was the best thing ever and that I'm glad to have time off and to only spend it with her during the daytime.

I'm so glad S came over later and gave me a massage.  That totally helped.  Well, I'm ready for tomorrow.  Time for bed!  Not everyday is a rose garden, but you know what?  We wouldn't appreciate the good if we didn't go through the ugly!

The Potty Chronicles continue

Today I felt better about giving Tigger more liquids to drink between the timer going off.  I noticed she would listen to the timer go off and head straight to the bathroom.  I still am teaching her how to lower her undies and climb onto the big potty, but then she does her business and all is well.  She had one mood swing with the timer and basically she didn't need to go, so she was whining in an attempt to let me know.  The next time the timer went off, she went with no problems.

I count the days in halves.  She is now at nap time so half number one of the day is over.  After nap time is half two.  Our first half was great today and no accidents yet.  I'm sure there still will be, I'm going to start offering her more liquids and see how it goes.

Well it's finally here

As a single working parent, I finally have 2 weeks and 1 day of vacation for winter break.  (Yeah working for the schools)  So what am I doing on this fabulous time off?

Officially potty training Tigger.  Have thought about it since September....but it never took and we were always out on the weekends, so today was day one in Minnie Mouse Undies.  I'm tired, I'm glad she's in bed.  Let's see how tomorrow goes although I have to say 1 major accident and one minor one on the way to the potty isn't bad.  I don't think I'll be able to relax until I have 3 days under my belt and then I probably won't relax.  Yup, so much for relaxing vacations....I think all that finished a while back.  Woo hoo parenting the 2's.

Flying by

Is it just me or is this Christmas season just flying by at super power speed?  Tigger and I have done a lot of stuff this month already.  S and I have done a lot of stuff this month already.  The three of us have done lots of stuff this month.  I can't believe that Christmas is here in a week!

Well here is a glimpse of the life of December:

Christmas program at the church....Tigger dressed as an Angel

Christmas program at Tigger's Preschool in the church next door to it:  They sang five songs and recited a little children's poem with grandparents beaming proudly:

Christmas Tree excitement!  Yes Tigger loves Christmas trees and smiles big for the camera:

And Birthday Parties galore.  Who knew Tigger had so many friends with December birthdays:

Our family loves to go look at lights.  Luckily we live semi-close to a neighborhood that has an extravagant display of lights:

And of course December wouldn't be December without a family picture:

Here's hoping the Christmas season is bringing joy in your life as it has to mine!

2 Years ago

on 12/15/2009 I brought this little one home and was absolutely excited and terrified beyond words.

She is now a 2 year old that I dearly love and constantly read, pray, and seek other mommy counsel so I can raise her the best way I can.

I love you my dear one....through the good days and the not so good days, never a moment goes by that I don't think of you!

The Con of Single parenting

No matter how altruistic your plans are....when you date, even when things are awesome, even when you shield  your kid from too much of the other person, your kid still breaks your heart and reminds you of why single parenting is hard.

Tonight Tigger was asking me about S.  I told her S doesn't live at the house and he was at work....that maybe she will see him on the weekend for a little bit.  She sat down and cried and asked me to open the door so that "S" could come in.

Sigh, as much as I try to keep it cool, she "knows"...and now Tigger likes S a lot and S really likes Tigger and is fun to be around when Tigger is with us even in a group.

Prayers for our family please!

From my house to yours

I hope this Thanksgiving brings about warm memories.  Tigger and I are doing well and just enjoying time together with family.

Poor S gets to spend Thanksgiving with my family and he is a big football fan and my folks aren't and usually have the TV off so we'll see how it goes.  Ah young love, he is sucking it up and coming anyways.  What a guy.  I told him he could go out with my cousins and check out game scores if he really gets antsy.

Hopefully you all are enjoying some great food by now or later in the day.

Peace and Joy from our house to yours!

And then life got interesting....

Hello friends out in blogosphere!

If you haven't noticed, my posts have been far and few in between.  I love this blog.  If I have any thoughts about parenting or adoption I still think about bringing it here, especially single parenting by choice.

Starting and maintaining the blog was easy.  I had thoughts, I was able to write in the evenings after the little one was in bed.  Life was smooth and uncomplicated.

I have been incredibly happy and complete!  I also made the choice not to actively date and to focus on my child  until she was older....and if by some reason some guy literally fell into my lap then ok I would consider but the possibility of that happening was very unlikely and I was very ok with that.

Can you guess what I'm about to say?  Yes, a guy literally fell into my lap.  I was secretly set-up by a mom friend and was invited to a lunch after church along with another friend of this family.  No expectations, they were hoping we'd be friends.  Well, we are friends.  The dating kind now.  It complicates life.  My Tigger is first and foremost.  After she is in bed, my new friend calls and we are slowly getting to know each other through the phone at night (when I usually was busy blogging) and we are able to see each other on the weekends.

Juggling parenthood and now dating is sometimes complicated.  I don't want to be one of those single moms that have guys coming in and out of a child's life.  My Tigger didn't sign up for that, heck she didn't sign up to end up with me either, and I am not willing to bring instability to Tigger's life.  I have already had the chat with my gentlemen friend about his intentions and that if he just wanted to play....he could look elsewhere, I have no time for it.  He received the message and has decided to stay in the picture.

Life is good.  Life is complicated.  I never thought this would be a turn I would be taking at this point in life.  If any of my readers especially the single mama's have any experience with this (ahem  MAMA MARGIE......I NEED YOUR SUPPORT AND ADVICE....E-MAIL ME) please feel free to offer any advice and mentor me!

Now that things have settled into the new normal of parenting first and dating second....I plan to continue my blog, however, I am still hoping to post about single parenting and adoption/foster care mostly.  That is how I started my blog and that's how I'd like to continue it.  I just thought I'd let you all in as to why I've been absent lately.

Cheating a little

Digging up an old post from last year....in honor of November and National Adoption Awareness Month

Journey to Tigger.

National Adoption Awareness Month

November is National Adoption Awareness Month.  Now some people automatically get all mushy and hearts start flying in the air and violin music and all that.  Others are more quiet about it, mostly meditating on ethics surrounding adoption as a whole.  Like most things in life I'm a middle-of-the-road gal.

I care about adoption happening the right way especially through foster care since that is my arena of interest.  I also get sentimental as November of last year was when Tigger was finalized and officially a member of the family--my family.

The truth of the matter is, foster care and adoption from foster care should be a topic of interest as it impacts our society.  Whether or not children in foster care reunite with family or are adopted into a new family, they are our kids.  We interact with them, they go to school with our kids, they are part of our future for a better place. It's high time we got involved in making sure ALL of the children in our community have a good chance at life for a future.

What are some ideas that we can do?

• be more mindful/helpful with the neighbors....especially the neighbors you think are struggling
• be mentors to your children's friends
• be mentors in the community
• Get involved with the department of family services in one way or another (donating, mentorship, contemplate being a foster home or an adoptive home if you feel that it is something you can do no matter how little (or not) gratitude/give back there is
• support families that have adopted from foster care
• be respite homes
• offer services or financial support if a family needs to pay for therapeutic services for their child 

Adoption is not all roses and butterflies, however, with AWARENESS, my hope is that we all can help our kids, our community find their place....a better place in this world.  

What can I say, the weekend before halloween

So this post is just a must:

pumpkin carving

She'd rather play with the insides

She wanted a happy face

My bee

pony ride at fall festival

Little petting zoo

A "Blonde moment"

So this is just a warning to all of you to make sure to absolutely KNOW what you put into a microwave even if you're spaced out due to minor illness.

Yes friends I almost caused a fire at work today.  The microwave looked something like this

after putting in what I thought was a safe item in the microwave....travel mugs with plastic and metal are never safe.....sigh (and I know this, but for some reason I was just not thinking today...I just wanted tea because I felt ill).  Oh well, it provided excitement and prolonged jokes at my expense for the rest of the day.  

Random link to a movie trailer....I really liked it!

Ok so tonight I'm going to be random and share a trailer of a movie I just saw this week.  It's not a blockbuster, while I do enjoy my "blockbuster men in suits with guns and fast cars" type of movies, I also can enjoy a good documentary or indi/small film.

The movie is called "The Namesake".  Apparently there is a book also and this movie is based off of it.  I've never read the book, but loved the movie.  While my parents and relatives are pretty much assimilated to America, I will say that it still is interesting growing up as a child of parents not born in America.  Almost as though we are between two worlds in which we don't "fit in" 100% but we do the best we can, succeeding yes, but often times still wondering where our place is.

This is why I love movies like "My Big Fat Greek Wedding" or any documentary that has to do with immigrants or first generation Americans living here.  Anyways I thought I'd share the trailer with you and just say that it's a great movie to see especially if one's parents were not born here but one is!  Also a good reminder to go easy on the folks even if there are differences that have to do with culture clash.

Tuesday Truisms: why 2 year old girls are fun

"I have no time for anything, cut my hair, do my nails, do every housework needing to be done, BLOG regularly, but in the end I know this age doesn't last and I need to live in the moment of magic"

"apparently when Mom doesn't oblige a request, a heart felt prayer and shout-out to Jesus is supposed to change that making for interesting moral dilemma on not squelching faith and not giving in to manipulation"

"apparently even if it is not introduced or encouraged, the mystery aura of "the diva" parades into the house and comes full force at times"

"modesty/humility is not present at all"

"The louder you cry, the more dramatic it sounds"

"I've never felt something more beautiful than a 2 year old hugging me.  There is something genuine and sincere about that"

"One day you wake up and are having short conversations with your child and you wonder how that came about!"

If I haven't said it enough, I will say it again.  I LOVE the 2 year old year.  This has been the.best.year.so.far.  Yes there is drama and at times some need for time-out....but I find nothing terrible about this age.  Tigger you are awesome and have your mami wrapped around your little finger (for love not for breaking rules or boundaries though...sorry girl!)

I looked around yesterday, I looked around today, and I'm sure I'll look around tomorrow

And I hope you will see someone who is content with life.  Before Tigger, I was content.  Sure I always wanted to be a mom, but really I was living the content life, enjoying my small house, work, and family.

I will not lie, I looked around and knew that I could provide a home and it's natural for individuals to be in constant communion with others and so I tried to provide a home and Tigger came into my life.  I am living the content life, enjoying my still small house, 2 year old, and family.

I think about the future.  An older child, maybe lots of ups and downs...maybe more relationships????, who knows....but I pray and hope that contentment is still a companion.  Why?  because life is not predictable.  If I don't enjoy my today's for all it's ups/downs and insecurities (yeah my state can't get it's budget together) there is never a promise of tomorrow.

My goal in life is to live each day content with my life.  I look around...my small house, the laughter I hear in the next room from Tigger, I smile and I know, I am living a life that even Kings and Queens would envy!

I hope that each of you that stop by and read here hug your families more and really just stop the madness and enjoy the life that is yours.  It may not be perfect or how you envisioned it, however, it is enough...and when you know you that you have enough, added blessings are like treasure!

Tigger and her cousin playing a game only 2 year olds would find amusing....run and fall into the grass