Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Tuesday Truisms: a small break to introduce stupid FB pervs

Facebook used to be so nice and un-spammy...(is that even a word?) and then all of a sudden this week I received two classic messages (I guess because my profile is private so people have to message me to even try to get a look around) 

Introducing John Weirdo*

Here's the message:

Hello there,
how are u doing out there? It's cool to see you on here..u really have nice picture..and you are really cute...actually you maybe wondering how i came across your profile but the thing is that i was going through the existing member of this site and i came across your picture and i like it so i thought that i should say hi..ok...Do you come on here often???..but if you are interested as i am interested in meeting you..you could give me your yahoo ID so that we could chat on there...i have my picture there...and i don't come on here much based on the work i do..am always on yahoo instant messenger...i would really love to know you more..


Wow Mr. Weirdo, nice to meet you too, always nice to get stalkers to get a message from a forward thinking man.  The irony is that this is the picture that was on my profile when he sent this message:


I mean I'm left to deduce that you are either pervy and are into kids um ewwww or like older women (no offense to my grandma but she was in her mid-40s when she had my mom) and since I'm not in that photo nor a child or in my 40s, I'll pass on your weird and pervy nice offer to get to know me more. 

Then later on in the week this is in my inbox from Mr. I'm confused about who you are*

"how are you doing ...i presumed fine just wondering how come a cute man like you still a single i bet you any woman can come ask you out for a date ..hope you dont mind getting a mail from a stranger am sorry if you do...i will like to learn more about you if you dont mind you can drop me a line back"
um ok, did you notice I WAS NOT a cute man?  just sayin' so since you're obviously confused as to my gender then no you don't need to learn more about me since I may not be your type.....(still had the same profile picture on there)

*Names have been changed to protect the guilty! (a great line i stole from the great Laura herself on fetch my flying monkeys)
So my truism for the day is  "Facebook is also full of online wannabe guys looking for love"


5 comments:

Sunday Koffron said...

So I really wonder if that ever works for them…I get those things, shudder and delet.

Marcy said...

I just have one thing to say. "Creepy"

Ticia said...

EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW............. I personally always find hilarious getting spam emails on yahoo for body parts I do not have.

Laura said...

Damn. Who knew FB was the new OKCupid. Sounds like a couple of trolls. I bet you took a shower after reading them.

Nicole said...

Haha Dannie I get these ALL the time... or the ones along the lines of "I just moved to Atlanta and was wondering if you wanted to show me around town?" NO SIR NO I DO NOT haha!