When I first heard this phrase (after I decided to adopt on my own) I would giggle uncontrollably because it just sounded so politically based. However, I really do fit the description. Have you ever heard of the term? If not, there are some great places to read about it.
Why mention that you're a single mother by choice or why have site to support independent, financially responsible women who seem to be content with their life? Well that's just it...because we're not dealing with divorce, custody issues, visitation, alimony etc. most of the self-help books on single parenting just doesn't really seem to address issues that don't involve grief, loss of a boyfriend/spouse, self-esteem. In fact in order to belong to a community like Choicemoms.org you do have to be a parent by choice, not because your significant other left you before the birth but still has visitation, or through divorce or death (if you have previously been divorced and then decided to parent a child on your own that's different). Of course these communities also look at women who have done and are also considering artificial insemination or IVF through a sperm donor (either known or unknown) as well as adoption.
I've joked about getting together with other single mother's by choice who have Faith in their lives to write a book about it just so it can be available at a Christian bookstore if needed because in my life, I don't need the "woe is me" single parenting book or the "how to get over him leaving me with 2 kids for another woman" single parenting book. In fact I've spent a few bucks too many on books I thought were going to be great and instead it ended up being a self-help book for divorcees and parenting from a place of grief. I need the practical single parenting book. You know the one. It answers very very important questions such as:
* When is the best time to shower and know your kid is safe?
* How do you finagle groceries into the house when your Toddler is now getting into trouble if your eye isn't on them? Is it ok to have them in their car seat while you race like a maniac to get the bags in before getting a ticket for bad parenting?
*How do you answer people about the wonderful life you have with your child when for some reason they find it odd that you enjoy being a single parent?
*How do you navigate being really sick and also having to look out for an active preschooler when you're either throwing up or trying not to pass out?
*What are great tips for evolving your support system?
*Answering questions at church and navigating feeling good about your life when people may wonder why on earth would you [as a Christian] would choose to have a single parent household and be chipper about it.
Those are the kind of books needed out there. Actually I know there are at least two books that deal with single mothers by choice which is great, however, they are more generic and deal with the the 'thinking' and 'how to...information' than daily life.
So if you're one of those single mothers by choice that reads on here and are living faith based lives, we should seriously think about writing that book!